Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Herbie to the rescue...

Time to bring back everyone’s favorite topic: Infrequently Asked Questions. Today’s query: “Dude, what is up with you and Lindsay Lohan? Seriously, this is getting disturbing.”

I’ll agree that I am not quite sure of where my attraction towards Lindsay (or as I prefer to call her, “My Beloved”) stems from. There are a couple of simple reasons, like the fact that until recently she was a redhead and my weakness for redheads has been well documented (to the point that I think former captured journalist Jill Carroll is pretty cute with her hair dyed red.) But that doesn’t explain my defending her against all of the other starlets out there right now.

First off, I do feel that Lindsay actually has some talent as an actress (we’ll just ignore her music career for the time being). She’s definitely not horrible but for a former child star she does have some actual ability. To me, that really puts her in a class above all of the others. Brittney Spears is a fair dancer, poor singer, worse actress and is not really that attractive. I always put her in the “fourth best looking girl on the cheerleading squad” category. I fully agree with Family Guy that Christina Aguilera is offensive to all five senses. Nicole Ritchie would float away in a slight wind and Paris Hilton is worthless in every aspect other than trust fund. (Nicky Hilton on the other hand, seems to be pretty cool.) So in that aspect Lindsay is in the lead.

Plus, until her recent “Dye my hair blonde, lose all my weight and stay up all night drinking and smoking”, she had a unique look in Hollywood in that she actually looked like a real person. She had curves and freckles and hair that wasn’t ironed straight. She was attractive because you honestly thought that you could meet someone who looked like her in a bar one night. Add to that the fact that she did seem to have a brain on her shoulders and things were looking really good.

Of course all of that seems to have gone out the window right now as she is falling apart. And maybe that is the other reason I’m so interested in her, the way this story is going there is only one ending and it isn’t a good one. So I sit around and read the gossip pages and hope that she can turn it around but know that she is a year away from rehab and four years away from The Surreal Life and that is really sad. I don’t know if I have ever seen someone rise and fall in front of my eyes in that way.

But, I still wouldn’t go so far as to put her on my Perfect Mate list. She’s fun to watch but I wouldn’t want to grow old and end up watching tv in matching recliners with her. There are only a few women who meet that criteria. And thinking of that, it has been nearly two years since I last published my Top 10 Perfect Mates so I might need to go ahead and update the list and see who now tops the list. Expect that in the next week or so.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

So what you're saying is that Lindsay looks pretty good when compared to Brittney, Nicole, Christina & Paris?

Isn't that basically like saying she's the tallest midget in a slam dunk contest?

If I were you I'd stick with the indy divas and Lisa Hannigan. But again, sometimes there's no accouting for my tastes either. So I retract the objection.