12:21 P.M.: And we are coming to you live from the summer residence of EC International, which is surprisingly similar to the winter and fall residences. But we have a cast of, yeah it’s just me again. Dude, even my barbecues suck.
12:22 P.M.: This time I’m going to live blog the Indy 500, one of my favorite sporting events of all time. Now I’m going to try to figure out how to make a 500 mile race read interesting.
12:24 P.M.: And yes, I know that I’ve missed the start of the race, including Jim Nabors singing Back Home Again in Indiana. I am bummed about that but I had a prior commitment. There are a few things in life that take precedence over writing.
12:29 P.M.: Here is a cool development, when they go to commercial they keep the race on in a picture in picture sort of deal. This saves you from the “everything cool always happens when they are in commercial” effect. On the other hand, eliminating this effect could also result in the elimination of anything cool ever happening.
12:30 P.M.: From Danica Patrick’s in car audio
Danica: “We need to go faster”
Crew Chief: “Well, it would help if you took it out of second gear.”
12:38 P.M.: Stephan Gregoire is making another run at Indy. He was my favorite story of last year, as he didn’t have a ride going into the last day of qualifying so he went with his wife to Babies R Us and was then called back to the track by A.J. Foyt. Gregoire then sat in the car and qualified. I love this story for two reasons. One, how bad ass are you when someone could just call you up and within two hours you are going 215 MPH down a track in a car you haven’t been in before. Second, this is the only time in the history of the planet where a guy can have a story start with “So I was at Babies R Us” and have it turn into anything interesting.
12:48 P.M.: Hey, I completely forgot to write about the Barbaro phenomenon last week. Now, I watched the Preakness and was saddened when I saw the horse break down because he was a really good racehorse. And I am happy to see that they saved the horse. But I’m at a loss for words for the people who are sending get well cards and letters. Or posting to online message boards. Because, let’s face it, he’s a horse. If he can also read we probably should not have been racing him.
1:09 P.M.: Thomas Sheckter continues his annual tradition of crashing at the Indy 500. Seriously, I don’t think that this guy has ever made it through a race without running into someone else or the wall.
1:11 P.M.: Pit stops, one of the most important and strategic portions of the race. It can keep you on the edge of your seat. Still, this doesn’t change the fact that I’ve just spent a few minutes of my life watching people get gas.
1:26 P.M.: I think they finally told Michael Andretti that he’s been driving with his left blinker on for the past fifty miles.
1:28 P.M.: Another part of the Barbaro story. We are basically wishing a horse well so that he could be put out to stud. Sure, we want the horse to live but mainly we want to be sure that he gets to score. And this line isn’t mine but it is the best that I read all week. “Why is it that we say a colt gets put out to stud but we never say that a champion filly gets put out to whore?”
1:36 P.M.: From Danica Patrick’s in car audio
Danica: “So where are we going again?”
Crew Chief: “Just turn left.”
Danica: “Are you sure of that?”
Crew Chief: “Yes, just turn left.”
Danica: “Maybe you should check the map again.”
Crew Chief: “For crying out loud, I know what I’m doing here.”
Danica: “Well you don’t have to yell…”
1:48 P.M.: Helio Castroneves runs into the back of Buddy Rice. For those of you wondering, Helio is the guy who climbs the fence when he wins the race. Hey, you’ve got to be known for something in life. Admittedly, I’d rather be Dario Franchitti and be known as the guy who is married to Ashley Judd.
2:29 P.M.: Little Al hits the wall. Otherwise, it’s just been guys going around in circles for a while.
2:47 P.M.: I think that we’ve been under yellow for the past twenty minutes. I am at a loss as to how to make guys driving in circles for twenty minutes at fifty miles an hour to be interesting. Still, this probably beats what I could accomplish if I blogged the national spelling bee championship on Thursday night. That said, I’ve got serious money riding on that spelling bee. Nothing like risking your paycheck on a home schooled ten year old.
2:54 P.M.: From Danica Patrick’s in car audio
Crew Chief: “All right we need you to make a move right now.”
Danica: “I know, I know.”
Crew Chief: “Get in there and fight.”
Danica: “Will you just be quiet and let me drive? Because if you don’t I’m just going to pull over right now.”
(Actually, Danica is driving a great race. Easily on pace for a top ten and maybe a top five finish. People make an Anna Kournikova reference with her and that really isn’t fair. Anna was basically all style over substance and was focused on style. Danica is racing as well as a second year racer (who doesn’t have a whole lot of other racing experience) could ever be expected to. She will win a race one of these weeks.)
3:02 P.M.: Marco Andretti, the 19 year old son of Michael Andretti, is running in third right now. That is really, really impressive. When I was nineteen I would barely trust myself driving on an expressway. This kid is running at the front of one of the biggest races in the world.
3:16 P.M.: And with a handful of laps left, Michael Andretti has taken the lead. Michael who has had the worst luck in the history of racing at Indy might actually have a chance at this thing. Or the Andretti luck is going to strike again. Let’s see what happens.
3:20 P.M.: And Marco just passed Michael with three to go with Sam Hornish Jr. trying to make a run.
3:22 P.M.: And Sam Hornish takes him at the stripe. Man, what a finish. That’s why I watch auto racing. Great finish by the Andrettis, though. A nineteen year old isn’t supposed to finish second at Indy and Michael finishes third, which isn’t bad for a guy who retired to be a team owner a few years back. Danica finishes eighth after being pushed back in the field due to pit stops and caution flags.
The five random CDs for the week
1) Howie Day “Live from…”
2) The Sundays “Blind”
3) Julie Miller “Broken Things”
4) Jack Ingram “Live from Billy Bob’s”
5) R.E.M. “Out of Time”
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