I’m a self-professed music geek. If you need proof look no further than the fact that I’ve spent the past two Monday nights watching the side projects of one of my favorite bands. It made sense when I saw Autumn Defense since that is basically the harmony section of Wilco. Last night I saw Glen Kotche’s solo act. Glen is the drummer. And when I say solo it was just him on stage. I watched his hour set, and, well, I’m not even sure if I can explain it. I will tomorrow, because I came across this today and I really need to rant. First, here is the link
http://www.rockhall.com/pressroom/definitive-200
The idea is that this is the definitive list of the top 200 albums of all time. As decided by the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and NARM (the association of music retailers). That should be your first warning sign right there. The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is basically a sham put together by Rolling Stone so that they can pat themselves on the back once a year and the association of music retailers don’t give a damn about quality as long as the disc sells. In fact, this entire list is basically a promotion for the retailers to sell a lot of back catalog releases. (It’s very intelligent marketing given that the average age of a CD purchaser is in the 30’s.) But that still is no excuse for putting together a “Definitive” list of great albums and producing this piece of crap.
Let’s walk through the 200, shall we?
Number one is Sgt. Pepper’s and I can live with that. Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon” comes in second and that is a bit odd. I’ve never heard it listed in the best album ever discussion and I think that the only reason it still sells is because the latest editions come complete with their own bong and a DVD of The Wizard of Oz. I hate Led Zeppelin and Led Zeppelin IV but other people feel passionately about songs about hobbits. But otherwise, the top 10 is pretty sensible though disordered.
The first “What the hell” moment is Santana’s “Supernatural” at 13. I don’t know anyone who would consider this to be a classic album. This was during the period when they’d grab whoever was the pop star of the moment and have them record with Carlos for the day, often without telling Carlos who this person is. Still not as bad as the 19-20-21 triumverate of the worst music ever recorded. Yes, according to the definitive list you must own The Doors “The Doors”, The Grateful Dead “American Beauty” and Shania Twain “Come On Over.”
If you own any of those albums I cannot be friends with you. I’m not even sure if I want you reading my blog (though don’t tell my advertisers that). The Doors are the most overrated band in the history of the planet. The Grateful Dead are considered influential because they gave people an excuse to get high for decades. And Shania Twain has two talents and they are neither singing nor dancing. You can’t take this list seriously with that mix.
It gets worse, if you could imagine. The Clash’s “London Calling”, which makes every top ten list including those for best polka albums of all time, charts in at 96. Just ahead of Celine Dion. Yes, the high point of punk rock is considered to be about as significant as a forgettable Celine Dion disc. And look at who comes in ahead of the only band that matters. The Grease Soundtrack (#37). Jewel “Pieces of You” (#64). Linkin Park “Hybrid Theory” (#84). Matchbox Twenty “They don’t even deserve me looking up their album title” (# 91). That is just horrible. No rational human being would ever say Matchbox Twenty is better than The Clash. Unless they are just focused on album sales.
And that’s what this list is, just a rather crass attempt to boost the back catalog. It’s not a listing of great albums. It’s a listing of extremely popular albums from the past thirty years that you probably haven’t listened to in a while. Hell, probably a few that you still have lying around on cassette and wouldn’t it be great to add these classics to your CD collection. I don’t fault record stores for trying to boost sales (lord knows they can’t survive on just me buying CDs.) But don’t try to pass this off as some critically selected greatest artistic moments of all time.
Just look at what recent albums aren’t on the list. The two most ambitious discs of the past two
years (Sufjan Stevens’ “Illinois” and Arcade Fire’s “Funeral”) are nowhere to be seen. Can’t find Wilco’s “Yankee Hotel Foxtrot” even though it was on every best of list in 2001 and 2002. And even R.E.M.’s “Murmur”, the album that launched a thousand rock bands and the entire college rock movement, doesn’t make the cut. Yet Live’s “Throwing Copper” and album that a) wouldn’t exist without R.E.M. and b) contains the only song I know of with the word “placenta” in the lyrics is deemed to be one of the best ever.
One of the pieces that I’m going to place in “Tawdry Amusements at Respectable Prices” (which I recently realized is a total rip off of a Guided By Voices album title) will be the 40 discs that you don’t own but should. It’s nice that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame wants people to buy yet another Boston disc. I’d rather encourage people to buy something that they would want to listen to.
In fairness though, here are the albums on the list that I do own:
U2: The Joshua Tree
Pearl Jam: Ten
U2: Achtung Baby
Dave Matthews Band: Crash (which isn’t even the best DMB disc. That would be Under the Table and Dreaming. Crash is where you realize that all Dave is singing about is essentially “Please sleep with me. Please?” And then he adds in sad puppy dog eyes. Admittedly, it is the same technique used by every guy at a DMB concert.)
Coldplay: A Rush of Blood to the Head
R.E.M.: Automatic for the People
Paul Simon: Graceland (#83 my ass)
The Clash: London Calling
Tom Petty: Full Moon Fever
The Police: Synchronicity
O Brother Where Art Thou Soundtrack (Ok, cool that this got included)
Sarah McLachlan: Surfacing (Again, not even the best album by the artist. Surfacing was uneven and incredibly short. It can’t touch Fumbling Towards Ecstasy. Possession (a song written about a guy who was stalking Sarah) is one of the best songs from the mid 90’s)
Sheryl Crow: Tuesday Night Music Club (I don’t even like admitting that I own this, much less recommend that anyone else pick it up)
Smashing Pumpkins: Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness (pick up Siamese Dream instead)
3 comments:
I think you hit the nail right on the head with this post. Sad to say I own 49 of the 200. Which ones, I won't tell. Why I bought some them, who knows, but a lot of them probably had something to do hot girls liking songs on the radio in college.
I would like to point out some of my picks that were on the list:
Miles Davis - A Kind of Blue
Radiohead - OK Computer (did I miss The Bends, or did they?)
Stone Temple Pilots - Core (surprisingly, its still listenable today, unlike other post-grunge albums from that era)
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Blood Sugar Sex Magik
U2 - All That You Can't Leave Behind (hated it at first, it later became my favorite U2 album)
A few glaring omissions:
Death Cab For Cutie - Transatlanticism
Postal Service - Give Up
High Fidelity Soundtrack
At least they didn't include any greatest hits cd's like Rolling Stone has done in the past. Do the editors of Rolling Stone even like music???
I don't think it's fair to say that record stores can't make a living just off you alone. Hell, ticketmaster does a pretty good job of it.
I'm going to add NOFX's "Punk In Drublic"
Oh, it's definitely the Top 200 list of CD's ....FOR ME TO POOP ON!
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