Staring at the ceiling

Off the top of my head…

1) Went through another trip of airport hell this weekend. When I die and hopefully meet St. Peter at the Pearly Gates I really want to ask just how much of my life was spent sitting on the floor of airports? My God, I’ve had relationships that have been shorter than the amount of time I spent lying on the floor of Midway this afternoon.

2) Oh, and for the people who were in line in front of me with three hundred bags sitting on a baggage cart (all going to be used as carry on) who took the bags but left the cart in the middle of the line so that the rest of us had to scramble over it, I just have this to say: Check your luggage next time you morons. Seriously, am I the only person with even a double digit IQ anymore?

3) Sign that your life just isn’t going the way you expect it. Driving home from the airport and looking up and seeing a billboard proclaiming “Everybody Hates Chris.” It’s one thing to be the title of a Wall Street Journal article but does it have to be a billboard as well? To everyone out there: I’m sorry for whatever it is I did wrong. But come on, you can’t all hate me.

4) Was in South Bend this weekend for a mini-reunion with a number of my friends and the great city of South Bend has decided to reconfigure the roads. All of them, basically. It is always fun to drive down a street that you drove every day for two years and know every inch of and suddenly discover that it is two hundred yards to the south of where it was before. It is the most disconcerting thing in the world. You are lost and you know exactly where you are. You start looking for landmarks like “Ok, if the radio tower is there then the street should be here.” Or you start wondering did they move the street or did all the buildings just move a quarter of a block to the north.

5) In something that means absolutely nothing to anyone other than me, my parents finally found a couple of books that had been lost in my parents’ house for the past two years. This will increase a couple of authors’ totals from a previous posting. The fun thing is how I noticed they were missing in the first place. When I moved I was putting all my books away and looked and figured out I was missing a Terry Pratchett and Jonathan Carroll book. Then a few weeks later I realized that my Jeff Buckley biography was gone. Three months ago I found out that I was missing a James Burke book. And when I did that spreadsheet I figured out that I had a missing Douglas Adams book. If you want a sign that you have too many books there it is. If it takes you two years to realize that something is missing you simply have too much stuff.

6) Oh and on the Cobra Kai front: Hey Peyton, would it bother you if you could throw a touchdown pass every once in a while? You’re just killing me. When I go to my triple Colt lineup I really need you to score more than thirteen points. Hey, sure all that matters is winning but I’ve got a lot of money invested here. Start producing or else.

The five random CDs for the week:
1) The New Pornographers “Mass Romantic”
2) Paul Simon “Graceland”
3) Continental Drifters “Continental Drifters”
4) Sally Timms and Jon Langford “Songs of False Hope and High Values”
5) Various Artists “Down from the Mountain”