Monday, June 22, 2009

Simple things are not my forte

When I started this blog back in the heady days of 2004 (back when My Beloved Lindsay was still a fresh faced eighteen year old) one of the main goals was to track my journey in finding love while stuck in Kansas City. It was a road fraught with danger and adventure and my being rejected in numerous creative and disconcerting ways. But over the years there was one constant: I could always be counted on to do something incredibly stupid. Always well meaning of course but I am a master of the act that makes people wonder just how I earned so many diplomas. Now that I have found the girl of my dreams (or found her again or she found me or I should really explain the whole chain of events one night because it really doesn’t fit in an aside) I had hoped that my days of well intentioned foolishness were behind me. Oh how wrong I was. So now, part one in an ongoing series called “Yep, I am an idiot.”

Kim and I are at the moment part of a long distance relationship (I’ll explain the whole situation later.) What this means is that all of our time together is dependent on flights and airports and the will of numerous factors that are controlled by the unseen hands governing the universe. This means that we never know precisely when the other is going to appear at the airport. However, it is readily apparent that if a mistake can be made I will be the one to make it.

First time was when we both flew into Chicago to celebrate her birthday. We had timed our flights so that we would land within twenty minutes of each other and could meet up with minimal hassle. Which was a great plan except I neglected to take into account the wonder that is the Philadelphia airport in which a soft mist can put the entire airport in a panic and as a result Kim landed in Chicago when my plane finally took off from Philly. There are many things a woman would like to hear on her birthday. “Go to Harry Carry’s at the airport and start drinking without me. I’ll be there in a few hours.” is not one of them.

Then there was Kim’s flight up to Philly a few weeks ago. Again, we have the wonderful Philly weather to blame as it was just one of those continually rainy day. Kim called me when she got on the plane on time so I looked at the airport information online. They had her flight as two hours late. Southwest had her flight as thirty minutes late. I leave work to pick her up betting on her being forty five minutes late. I am five minutes out of my parking lot (and a good fifty from the airport) when my phone buzzes as she texted me that she had just landed thus causing me to say once again “Find a bar and have a beer. I am on my way.” For the life of me I still can’t figure out how two hours delayed becomes on time in the span of ten minutes but no matter, I’m still the idiot.

This Friday may just take the cake, though. I fly in to Florida and Kim tells me that she will be at the airport early to pick me up (she has also been late on occasion but that is neither here nor there.) I land on time, text her that I landed and walk to the far door of the baggage claim area to wait for her. Now, I could have walked out the first door I saw and then just walked up the sidewalk to have a full view of all of the cars that were there. It isn’t a big airport and it isn’t much of a walk. That would probably be labeled as intelligent. Instead I walk directly to this one spot because, well, I’ve always stood there when she’s picked me up. I looked briefly to see if her car was waiting farther down but apparently not hard enough because for ten minutes we waited fifteen yards apart without seeing one another. It is amazing that I can fly across the country to see her, have that be my only desire in the world, and still when I land I stand in one spot because all of the other times I have stood there her car has magically appeared in front of me. As I am often forced to admit “Yes, I am an idiot.” Luckily I am adorable enough to get away with it. Most of the time.

The five random CDs for the week:
1) Cowboy Junkies “200 More Miles”
2) Beth Orton “Best Bit”
3) Hank Williams III “Lovesick, Broke & Driftin’”
4) Mindy Smith “One Moment More”
5) U2 “Rock’s Hottest Ticket”

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