Monday, April 14, 2008

Because I don't have enough puzzles in my life...




Reason number 287 to love The Big Bang Theory: Sheldon used my favorite phrase “curiouser and curiouser” tonight when he was struck by a social situation that he could not comprehend. I do that all the time. Why yes, I identify with fictional geniuses. Why do you ask?

Let’s see what Kelli has for my horoscope today: “It’s easy to dismiss what you don’t understand. Confusion invites learning. This could even be a growth experience. You needed one anyway.”

So apparently my astrologer wants me to grow up. It’s nice to know that one twelfth of the earth’s population is having the exact same problems that I am.

Anyway, so I promised yesterday that I was going to attack the day today. That I was going to leave no stone unturned, no challenge unmet and that I would be up at 7 in order to do it. Technically it was more like 7:45 so to my faithful commenter, oops, sorry I didn’t get your kids to school on time. Eh, in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t make a difference. I had my share of perfect attendance awards and look where it got me.

But I did get up earlier than I had been and made breakfast and drove to a coffee shop in order to pick up my morning coffee. Now given that it was only four blocks away I could have walked except that a) I’m still lazy and b) it was like 30 degrees out this morning (hear that Al Gore!) and no way I was walking in that weather. I also could have brewed my own coffee as I do have a coffee pot in my apartment. However, in the nearly five years that I have lived here it has been used exactly zero times. Not only am I not entirely sure how it works but I am relatively convinced that using it will result in a disaster of epic proportions. It exists solely as ornamentation with the coffee in my pantry just being a prop to indicate to women that I could conceivably take care of myself. There is a similar theory behind my occasionally buying a plant in order to show that I can take care of another living creature (the fact said plants tend to die notwithstanding.)

So, coffee in hand I sat down at the laptop and promised myself to do a few hours of job search followed by some writing. Logged in, went to job sites and, in a word, “Eep”.

“Eep” being shorthand for “I suddenly have a feeling that I am totally out of my league here.”

Now CareerBuilder does give me some nice suggestions. For instance, they are continually recommending that I apply for a Product Marketing Manager position at Sprint, which at least meets my federally mandated daily irony consumption requirement. But I am completely lost in their system and I just felt completely overwhelmed by the whole process. I didn’t have my head around where to look, what to look for, or what to do. So I did what any rational minded individual would do. I went shopping.

Thus I am now the proud owner of the above pictured 3,000 piece jigsaw puzzle. Now as those who read the 43 Things post know one of my goals is to complete a massive jigsaw puzzle all by myself. Technically it was supposed to be a 5,000 piece puzzle but a) I couldn’t find one anywhere in town and b) those things are apparently really expensive. At least a hobby shop had this 3,000 piece one (on sale so it was obviously an intelligent purchase). I then had to find a board for it. I could give up the use of my dining room table for a month in order to complete it but I occasionally dream of having someone visit my apartment who doesn’t read the blog and I have a feeling that using an entire room of my apartment for a jigsaw puzzle would not quite give off the best impression. (I figure that there is nothing that I can say or do that would ever change the opinion of someone who reads this blog. They’ve pretty much seen me at my best and worst so they can make of it what they will.)

My solution? I picked up one of those boards that kids use for science fair projects. Fits perfectly under the bed in my spare bedroom. The plan is for me to spend some time on this every day as a kind of meditation, mind emptying exercise. At the end of the day I’ll take a picture of my progress and when I complete it I’ll create a slideshow of the progress. I’m pretty sure that if I add in some Benny Hill music I’ll be an internet sensation.

Does this get me any closer to getting a job? Well, no. It doesn’t get me any closer to finishing the novel either. But it did take up a portion of my day. Tomorrow will be a work day. Unless I decide to get my car washed. But Wednesday I’ll certainly do some work…

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now I have something to do Wed. morning on my way to an interview I have downtown at 11 - I'm stopping by to throw out your puzzle.
Yeah, my kids were late to school today.
Yeah, I am in a bad mood this week which will get worse and worse until Sunday when it should get better... but you really had better hide that puzzle-thing from me.

Anonymous said...

if it makes you feel less like a dork (or at least that there are other like you) I currently have my kitchen table fully consumed with a 1000 piece photomosiac puzzle. putting pieces together that blur and that are covered with tiny pictures is an exercise in conposure to not just toss teh thing out the window.
but... it is a great mind emptying exercise which is greatly appreciated after a day at the dream killer factory of corporate america. :)