New Year's Resolutions: 2014 Edition

As someone who believes in public accountability here are my resolutions for the year for the world (or at least the twenty people and / or robots who seem to read my blog posts) to see.

1)      The Sincerity Project: I’ve already discussed this as it is one of the main reasons for restarting the blog. In essence, my goal is to change from being a cynical bastard to someone who is an actual caring human being. To be honest this has been absolutely brutal to put into practice. I don’t know if it is humanly possible to watch Brent Mussberger announce the BCS title game and not be sarcastic but I am certainly trying. You’ll occasionally catch me stopping myself from saying something and saying “sincerity check” instead. Hopefully I’ll end up a better person for this at the end of the year.

2)      Complete the 13 week advanced level of DDP Yoga: I’ve mentioned it before but I am a huge fan of DDP Yoga. I firmly believe that the best fitness programs are developed by former professional wrestlers as they are clearly medical experts. I’m serious here, I’ve been doing DDP Yoga on and off for the past nine months and the degree that my flexibility and fitness have improved is amazing. I’m in the best shape I have ever been in and my weight is now under 180 pounds, which is thirty pounds less than it was five years ago. I really want to make it through the advanced level and see what the results are.

3)      Keep the blog going all year: Huge challenge but I feel so much better when I write that this is something I need to do. You may see more posts like last night though where I hit a few points and then just end it. I can’t spend an hour staring at a screen trying to figure out what to write any more. Trust me, I really wish I had that much free time again.

4)      Read forty books: I’ve come close the past few years but I typically end up falling short. This year I want to actually break the forty book barrier. As always, my yearly goals of 1) read one classic novel, 2) read something by a female author and 3) read a Shakespeare play still hold and I can say that over the past decade the second point is no longer a challenge. I had too many years where if it wasn’t for Harry Potter I would never have achieved that goal.

5)      Travel someplace new this year: This is a nice way to say that Kim and I need a vacation that is different than ones that we have taken before. We are in a bit of a rut in terms of trips and just need to escape to someplace fresh. Obviously we will still make our trip to New Orleans for the Krewe of Barkus and all of the fun associated with our second home but I particularly need to find myself in a new place.

6)      Reader’s Choice: I’ve done this before and it is always interesting. Place your suggestion in the comments for what my resolution should be and I promise to do it (legality permitting of course). This is how I ended up doing yoga in the first place.

7)      Run a 5K: An easy fitness goal but one I would like to do. After so many years of being scared of doing anything physical due to fear of causing myself harm I want to go back to trying something athletic. Plus, I will now be in the 40+ category so I might actually have a decent chance at placing somewhere in the top 90%.

8)      Take at least five minutes each day to just be: I don’t think that I will ever believe just how lucky I am in life. I’ve achieved so many of my dreams that I feel guilty about it. However, I’ve learned that the man who gets everything that he has ever wanted finds himself pulled in a thousand directions without time to appreciate or be grateful for any of it. If there has been anything that I have lost over these past few years it is that sense of appreciation of just what this world is. I’m hoping that by just making myself to take five minutes in which I turn off everything, avoid the digital noise that surrounds me and just let myself be and think I will be able to improve myself in countless ways. That is the idea behind the Sincerity Project. Modern life forces you to be tired, over-stimulated and cynical. I want to be open, honest and thankful instead.

Wednesday Night Music Club: The best album of 2013 was easily Jason Isbell’s “Southeastern.” It is a haunting and piercing collection of songs that stay with you for days at a time. He is an amazing songwriter and while this album can’t be considered uplifting (it deals with addiction and its aftermath) you will not forget some of what he sings. This song, which closes the album, ends with what might be one of my new mantras in life. “Here with you there is always something to look forward to. My lonely heart beats relatively easy.”

Celebrating the holiday by turning left....

Here is a change that happens when you get married, or just find yourself in a relationship in general. A few years back I made it a tradition of live blogging the Indy 500. This basically meant sitting in my apartment alone, typically hungover from the night before, and while watching the race I would write down my thoughts and typically a few really bad Danica Patrick jokes. (You know, she doesn't have to continually keep her left blinker on the entire race.) Last night, seeing that the Monaco Grand Prix was going to be broadcast live on NBC I realized I could spend the entire day watching Monaco, Indy and the Coca Cola 600 and just write about sitting on the couch and watching auto racing all day. Then I remembered that I am married and would like to remain so. Thus, I've just watched parts here and there while doing gardening and other things. Still, here are my thoughts.

1) I really expected a better finish by Tony Stark at Monaco this year. You would think that he would have been able to modify his strategy to address potential attacks by Whiplash but apparently he is still susceptible to attacks by an unkempt Mickey Rourke.

2) I was lucky that Monaco was delayed by a crash so I actually got to watch the end of the race live. It is an amazing race to watch just because of the sheer insanity of it. Cars running on incredibly narrow, continuing twisting city streets and several tunnels. It is a video game level come to life.

3) There are three songs you need to hear every May. My Old Kentucky Home, played before the Derby, Maryland my Maryland, played in front of a crowd suffering from acute alcohol poisoning at the Preakness, and the undying zombie that is Jim Nabors belting out Back Home Again in Inidana.

4) Really happy that Tony Kanaan won Indy. I've watched the race for 30 plus years now and over the last ten years or so he has done everything except win the race. At least once he was in first place when the race was stopped for rain and would have won if it kept raining. Other times he just got caught in wrecks that weren't his fault. He always seemed like a nice guy and someone who everyone in racing liked. Awesome.

5) And as always, congrats to the Indiana Dairy Board for the most bizarre tradition in sports. You've just spent three hours in a car, wrapped in a safety suit to prevent you from catching fire and what do you do when you are finally done? Have a sip of warm milk.

6) The NASCAR race is still going on but we already have our story of the night. A cable on the Fox Sports Sky Cam broke, fell on the track, was run over by several cars, damaging those cars and injuring fans. Fox Sports, were just like Fox News except with slightly more injuries.

Sunday Night Music Club: Please remember what tomorrow is truly about. If there is any song I can think of that expresses the way is this one by Jason Isbell. Remember those that didn't come home and help those that did.

Forgotten MTV Personalities: Volume One

Inspired by the book “I Want my MTV” I am starting a new recurring feature in which we examine some of the legendary characters of the Golden Era of MTV…

VJ’s always came in different shapes and styles. There were always the cute girl next door types or the comedian or the guy who is best known for his hair (few people know that widescreen TVs were invented solely to fully capture the glory of Adam Curry’s mane.) But only one WV existed solely to be the grunge DJ and that is our old friend, Steve Isaacs.

Featuring a look that screamed either “Seattle” or “That guy who sits in the fourth row of your English 103 class” Steve Isaacs ushered MTV into an era of Pearl Jam and Nirvana and left once we reached the era of Bush and Silverchair and completely disavowed all knowledge of the network by the time of Limp Bizkit. He was an example of 120 Minutes becoming mainstream as we no longer require a British accent to denote what was cool or not. Even if that was by having a kind of goofy, skinny guy with long hair act as the representative for an entire generation.

I have to be completely honest here, before reading I Want My MTV I could not for the life of me remember this guy and certainly not his name. But I guarantee that once people my age look at his picture we all immediately remember him. That was one of the wonders of MTV where even the minor celebrities became an integral part of our lives because they were always there. But more accurately, Steve Isaacs was probably the first VJ that I can remember who I legitimately thought that I could know in real life.

Because that really was the way a group of us were in the early 90’s. Ok, maybe I did not have the long hair and I wore less flannel but the idea of being young and really into this new type of music and having an almost childlike enthusiasm about it. We hung out at record stores at 11:55 on Monday nights just so we could get the new releases at midnight because we just had to have that new Breeders CD immediately. We made mixtapes and spent our free time rummaging through used CD racks trying to find some hidden gem. We thought we were unique but really we were just enjoying the thrill of youth and experiencing life on our own terms.

So cheers to you, Steve Isaacs. Once Pearl Jam no longer required MTV neither did you or any other member of Generation X. And who could sit through a Bush video anyway.

Wednesday Night Music Club: I’ve been listening to a lot of Jason Isbell recently. He is a former member of the Drive-By Truckers and might be one of the best songwriters around today. Give him a listen.

Life in the Middle of Things

Average Life Expectancy of an American Male: 75.6 Years
My Age: 36.47 Years
Percent of Life Lived (Assuming Average Lifespan): 48.2 %

Sometimes viewing your life in numbers can be frightening. It is just part of my nature. I feel the need to quantify every aspect of my existence. I have kept a list of every book that I’ve read since 1998, my CD collection has a dedicated database for tracking purposes and I could provide you a monthly budget of income and expenses for, oh, the past fifteen years at least. This is what happens when you raise your son on a steady diet of math and science. You go from competing in math contests to living a life where all that matters are numbers. While numbers are concrete and unemotional they can certainly be scary.

I’ve been joking for a while that I am reaching the point of having a mid-life crisis but I had never actually done the math. I had assumed that I was still on the near side of my lifespan. Sure, I was getting close to the middle but I still had years to go. Instead I am basically there. In less than a year and a half I will be at the midpoint of the actuarial charts of what my life is supposed to be and if that thought doesn’t make you rethink life something must be a little wrong.

This isn’t that I am upset about the current status of my life. I mean, let’s be honest, I don’t think that it has ever been better. I’m in love, planning a wedding, and have finally found that piece that has been missing for all of these years. My job is challenging and interesting and I enjoy it even if everyone’s eyes glaze over when I try to describe it to them. (For the life of me I will never understand why other people don’t find marginal pricing models interesting.) I’m as healthy as I could be and I have traveled the world and have accomplished more than I have ever dream of.

Still, if I am really at the halfway point my first thought is “I better start getting my ass in gear.”

If there is anything that defines me it is the sense of always wanting another challenge. I love placing myself in a situation where everyone assumes that I will fail and proving them, or even myself, wrong. I’ve always had that competitive fire in me and since I’ve never been good in sports I’ve always had to come up with other ways to test myself and seeing that I’m at the halfway point I might as well start of thinking of some big goals.

I still want to write a novel or a book of some kind. I know that the blog is in some sense a book especially given that I am well past the half a million word mark. But I just want to take on writing something original and meaningful. It has been a lifelong goal and I’ve never done it. I want to travel more and read more and learn how to play guitar just so I would have an excuse to have a guitar lying around the house. I want to be a wonderful husband and a caring uncle and a good friend. I want to have a smile on my face more than a grimace or a frown. I want that one last chance to show the world what I am capable of.

I don’t think that I am at the halfway point of my life. I think that I have a bit more runway ahead of me than that. But if that is the case I want to make the second half the best that it can possibly be. Some people reach their mid-life and go “I’ve wasted my life.” I want to take this moment and go, “Let’s kick ass from here on out.”

I’ll give Jason Isbell the last word tonight…