Up, up and away

I have reached the point in my career where I am sent on business trips. Not overnight trips mind you, I yet have reached hotel room status, but still a trip there and back is now part of my job criteria. Outside of allowing me to see things that I might otherwise not see (mainly Sbarros at various airports) it does create a very strange disconnect from what is going on in the rest of the world.

I’ll explain with today’s big news story. When I made it to the airport for my flight home this afternoon I saw a television turned to CNN with a Breaking News logo and something that looked very similar to a UFO. I was thrilled that a UFO invasion would be considered breaking news but rather surprised that CNN didn’t already have graphics premade with “Aliens Attack!” I look at it and quickly find out the a six year old has floated away in a helium balloon and am a combination of surprised, amused and concerned about the little guy’s well being.

So I fly out and as I make my way out of the terminal after landing I make sure to try to find a television. The image of something falling from the balloon took most of the humor out of the situation. The story was now somber and dire. It is not the way you wanted that story to end.

I drove home dealing with crappy traffic due to the rain and when I get to my apartment I flip on CNN to get the update only to find that the kid was never in the balloon. He had been hiding in the garage because he was scared that he would get in trouble for releasing the balloon from the parents’ backyard. This was a great relief because no one wants to see a six year old hurt and it raises fun questions like what did this cost law enforcement and who builds a flying saucer balloon and keeps in the backyard in plain reach of small children anyway?

Thanks to the internet I was able to find out just who. Apparently the family had appeared on Wife Swap: the reality show that isn’t nearly as dirty as it sounds. It also mainly exists to highlight the most unstable families in America as we get to see the worst parenting techniques imaginable. So the next time you see a madcap character on a reality show remember that they might be building their own spaceship in their backyard.

For the record though, I still feel sorry for the little guy who is going to get yelled at for starting all of this. I remember when I was his age and my robot got loose in the neighborhood and destroyed several garages and scared more than a few dogs before it was stopped. Sure, it probably wasn’t wise to allow a six year old to equip flamethrowers to a machine that had a high probability of becoming sentinent but how is a kid every supposed to learn unless he makes mistakes? It wasn’t my fault that I got the sign backwards in the source code.

Enjoy the weekend everybody. Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars.