I almost went to grad school in Gainsville...

Since it is all kinds of late and I really need to get to bed I’ll try to be quick tonight. Here are a few things that are on my mind.

1) The University of Florida has the absolute ugliest band uniforms that I have ever seen. They look like a bad tracksuit that your grandparents would wear. Why is it so difficult to have good looking band uniforms? Seems to me that this would be the easiest thing in the world to accomplish.

2) I can’t say that I am appalled by the whole “let’s write messages on our eye black” trend but I think it has gone far enough. It was neat when they first showed that eye black technology had improved to the point where it is now possible and when the first athlete said “Hi mom” or gave a shout out to his hometown with it. Now I’m just waiting to see full advertisements on there.

3) I read about the following products today that were shown at CES. Electronic cigarettes in which you have a metal tube with a nicotine dispenser but without any of the flame, tobacco or coolness associated with smoking. A Bluetooth pillow because I am apparently tied down by the need to plug in mine. And an animatronic Obama because, well, what house isn’t complete without an aninatronic Obama?

4) Also found on the internet today: a movie featuring a basketball team composed of vertically challenged folk taking on a team of regular sized people that features “Dennis Rodman as Himself”. Every once in a while I wonder if I should just head out to the West Coast, buy a new wardrobe, hire an agent and try to make it as a writer. Then I read a movie synopsis such as that and realize that to make it work I would also have to spend the entire trip out there with my head in a vise, twisting the handle every time I crossed into a new state so that by the time I reached California I could read that first sentence and go “Yeah, I could write that script for you no problem.”

5) For those in KC who wonder yes I still read the Pitch online. It’s just like the regular Pitch except, uh, without all of the fun advertisements in the back. (But how am I to find out who is the featured dancer at Bazooka Showgirls this week?) Anyway, in a sign of how bad the economy is Fox4 is going through a set of budget cuts that includes the grounding of the news chopper and no more free coffee. That has to suck for the morning crew. “You have to be on the air at 5 in the morning but get your own damn coffee.” Though not listed I also assume that the wacky weatherman will be asked to be less wacky to save costs.

6) I was originally planning on doing my year end concert review tonight but I actually did not go to that many concerts this year. To make up for it though over the weekend I will analyze the concert scene for my five years in KC and unveil my Top Ten Concerts of the KC Years (with videos for each band so you can tell what I am talking about). Special Awards will also be handed out. Does this mean the return of the madness that is Superargo? Come back this weekend and find out.